Intro

I recently started writing a blog about my life growing up and the struggles I had. It has been a great form of therapy for me but I have been finding it hard to write everyday about the tough stuff and find that there are other things I would love to also write about that are going on on a daily basis. So I decided to start this separate blog. I know another blog about being a mom, I am not going to sit here and say I am offering a new look or way or expertise on how to raise children and it will not always be about raising children. I am just here giving my view of the parenting I go through.
For example, the other day my 2 year old daughter was laying on top of her Cinderella doll making out with her. Some parents may react and think oh crap my child is making out with a same sex doll. Some parents may say what the hell is she watching that is giving her these ideas. My reaction was, it is interesting that she is picking up that passion from something she has seen on TV and she is so young. It made me re-evalute my relationship with my husband. We don't have this crazy passion for each other, not because we don't love each other but between the crazy hours we worked (back when I was working) and now having two very young children we are both tired and just go through the motions of the day. I decided to talk to my husband about it and we both thought we should be more affectionate towards each other because our children should see that growing up. They should learn how to love through seeing our love for each other. Neither my husband nor myself ever really saw that affection with our parent's relationships, which is probably why it was so easy to let our initial puppy love spark die out.
I have noticed in the past couple days that our daughter has been more lovey than usual. She was always huggy and kissy but now she runs over and joins our hug and looks for our kisses. It is a great change and I wish we had started it earlier.
Just a little background, I am a mother of two, daughter who is 2 and son who is 6 months. I have a BA in psychology. I have worked with children for many years in jobs ranging from teaching, to childcare, to residential treatment centers, to being a family support worker with a national program for new parents. I have a very good understanding of child development and have quite a number of practical tricks up my sleeve when it comes to difficulties of being a parent. However I am new to being a parent so this is still all a learning experience for me. My husband and I got married in 2009 with only a couple friends present, our families still do not know we are married. He had no experience with children until our daughter was born. After I had my daughter I returned to work, which was not easy. Just before her first birthday we decided to move about 4 hours away to live with my mother and save money so we could someday buy a house of our own. Shortly after we moved I got pregnant with my son and I knew trying to get a job in my field would be difficult especially having to leave for maternity leave 8 months after starting. We decided me staying home till after our son arrived was best. My son came in October and we planned on me looking for work after the holidays were over. Then the Newtown shooting happened, I sat on my couch holding both kids all day crying. How could I put them in someone else's care now?!?! Not only that but trying to find a job where I would be making enough to cover their daycare and make more to save was impossible, non-profit pay sucks. Then we did our taxes... Definitely more beneficial for me to remain at home for now. I miss the work I did and helping people, I also miss the adult interaction but I love having this time with my kids. There are definitely some difficult days but the good 10 times over out weigh the bad.